Well it's been a while since I've written anything. This summer has been crazy! God has brought me into a tough season. It's been hard to write because my mind has been on overload. And I really do mean overload; watch out, this one is long!
I can't find a melody line to describe
What I'm feeling inside tonight
The silence seems to be the best fit
For the scene I'm seeing myself live
It's been a long time since I've feared
Be near Abba Father and hear my words
My heart is first to do Your will
Please fill the crying doubts with shouts of faith
Make Your grace shine on my eyes
I desire to fulfill Your will but still
I can barely see over this hill in front of me
Lord bring a gleam of light
Make things right again
But maybe my right isn't the same as Your right
Maybe this fight in my faith
Is the face of something new
You already knew this would come
It's no surprise to You...is it?
Sometimes I want to run
Because I've begun to see You stretch me
When I am willing
And it isn't exactly appealing
To be shaken and have no feeling
To wonder why and where and how
I never want to doubt You
But somehow doubt has become my friend
It's hard not to be deceived by trend
It's easy for them to pretend their lives are free
Free from the application and condemnation
Of sin's backstabbing termination
I have followed You and ignored the world
I took up the sword and put to death my flesh
You began to revamp the mess I was in
Lord when I look back I see you never once failed me...
But I got real comfortable in your grace
The faces of your people each day
The praises with your people I sang
I asked you to take me to greater things
To stretch me and to have your way
Little did I know...
You would move me to grow
In a way much different than I have known
To show me that You never do what I expect from you
I must think less of me because you are King
Which means You reign above this finite brain
And all the names I try to put on Your ways
I feel like I've been launched into something huge
Something so unfamiliar and new
Lord I am learning to trust your plan
When I don't understand
You are gracious and patient with me
You would never turn Your back on me
Surely You won't forsake me
For I seek Your face daily
You know my heart
You see my start and my end
You hemmed me together
You know me better than I know myself
You've always been my help
My Shelter from the storm
My Daddy and my Lord
You are for me...
Therefore I will stand and open my hands
To the One who came humbly as a man
Like you I receive the plan laid out for me
Though it won't be easy you are with me
And I can keep on this journey
As faith keeps churning
And my heart is yearning for You
It's true that You are all I have
I'm sure You laugh...
Because I think you like it that way
So all I have left to say; is Abba Father, have your way...
"Answer me quickly, O Lord; my spirit fails. Do not hide your face from me or I will be like those who go down to the pit. Let morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul. Rescue me from my enemies, O Lord, for I hide myself in you. Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on level ground. For your name's sake, O Lord, preserve my life; in your righteousness, bring me out of trouble. In your unfailing love, silence my enemies; destroy all my foes,
for I am your servant."
Psalm 143:7-12
The silence seems to be the best fit
For the scene I'm seeing myself live
It's been a long time since I've feared
Be near Abba Father and hear my words
My heart is first to do Your will
Please fill the crying doubts with shouts of faith
Make Your grace shine on my eyes
I desire to fulfill Your will but still
I can barely see over this hill in front of me
Lord bring a gleam of light
Make things right again
But maybe my right isn't the same as Your right
Maybe this fight in my faith
Is the face of something new
You already knew this would come
It's no surprise to You...is it?
Sometimes I want to run
Because I've begun to see You stretch me
When I am willing
And it isn't exactly appealing
To be shaken and have no feeling
To wonder why and where and how
I never want to doubt You
But somehow doubt has become my friend
It's hard not to be deceived by trend
It's easy for them to pretend their lives are free
Free from the application and condemnation
Of sin's backstabbing termination
I have followed You and ignored the world
I took up the sword and put to death my flesh
You began to revamp the mess I was in
Lord when I look back I see you never once failed me...
But I got real comfortable in your grace
The faces of your people each day
The praises with your people I sang
I asked you to take me to greater things
To stretch me and to have your way
Little did I know...
You would move me to grow
In a way much different than I have known
To show me that You never do what I expect from you
I must think less of me because you are King
Which means You reign above this finite brain
And all the names I try to put on Your ways
I feel like I've been launched into something huge
Something so unfamiliar and new
Lord I am learning to trust your plan
When I don't understand
You are gracious and patient with me
You would never turn Your back on me
Surely You won't forsake me
For I seek Your face daily
You know my heart
You see my start and my end
You hemmed me together
You know me better than I know myself
You've always been my help
My Shelter from the storm
My Daddy and my Lord
You are for me...
Therefore I will stand and open my hands
To the One who came humbly as a man
Like you I receive the plan laid out for me
Though it won't be easy you are with me
And I can keep on this journey
As faith keeps churning
And my heart is yearning for You
It's true that You are all I have
I'm sure You laugh...
Because I think you like it that way
So all I have left to say; is Abba Father, have your way...
"Answer me quickly, O Lord; my spirit fails. Do not hide your face from me or I will be like those who go down to the pit. Let morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul. Rescue me from my enemies, O Lord, for I hide myself in you. Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit lead me on level ground. For your name's sake, O Lord, preserve my life; in your righteousness, bring me out of trouble. In your unfailing love, silence my enemies; destroy all my foes,
for I am your servant."
Psalm 143:7-12